RECALL
NOTICE:
The Maker of
all human beings (GOD) is recalling all units
manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a
serious defect in the primary and central
component of the heart.
This is due
to a malfunction in the original prototype units
code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the
reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent
units.
This defect
has been identified as "Sub-sequential Internal
Non-morality," more commonly known as S.I.N., as
it is primarily expressed.
Some of the
symptoms include:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
The
Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault
for this defect, is providing factory-authorized
repair and service free of charge to correct this
defect.
The Repair
Technician, JESUS, has most
generously offered to bear the entire burden of
the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no
additional fee required.
The number to
call for repair in all areas is:
P-R-A-Y-E-R.
Once
connected, please upload your burden of
SIN through the
REPENTANCE
procedure.
Next,
download ATONEMENT from the
Repair Technician, Jesus, into
the heart component.
No matter how
big or small the SIN defect is,
Jesus will replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control
Please see
the operating manual, the
B.I.B.L.E. (BEST Instructions
Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the
use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing
to operate the human being unit without correction
voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the
unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list,
and will result in the human unit being
permanently impounded. For free emergency service,
call on Jesus.
DANGER: The human
being units not responding to this recall action
will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN
defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as
to prevent contamination of that facility. Thank
you for your attention!
-
GOD
P.S. Please
assist where possible by notifying others of this
important recall notice, and you may contact the
Father any time by 'Knee mail'!
Because HE
Lives!
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